moderation of abundance

Sitting down and thinking about my experiences in recent days make me not help but wonder how rich my life could be. It also brought me back to the time when me and my peers (camp-mates) had unrestrained fun. This happens only if i allow such opportunities to meander toward the direction of enjoying the company of my peers, and not be too uptight about stuff in general. Happenstance (a chance circumstance) to which i may not have control over, unless i choose to become assertive, also actually allows me leeway to react in a manner that pleases me. Its all about how i reciprocate or how i choose to react to a certain something that comes my way. Positively, at least i have a choice and have greater control on how things would turn out. However, with that i was also missing out on plenty of things. Therefore, in the last few days, i resolve to joke and horse around with my peers without much reservations, just like in the good ol' days of yore.

In order to not sound so obsecure with my ramblings, i would quote an example; for about half a year now, my existence (in camp) has been doggedly melancholic. In camp i would be pretty restrained and somehow i would just hold myself back when others around me are having fun (wrestling each other and stuff). Not that i make all efforts to keep myself away from them, but i just wanted to have more time to myself. I held certain reservations, hence, i did not feel so part of the group. Previously, being easy going, i would initiate things and more often than not i am the central figure in the crazy antics and male bondings in camp, however, thanks to an indefinite period of melancholia i would appear distant. Until recently, i would just be a third party looking at the fun taking place around me, basically just looking and not participating. Some friends in camp can attest to that, but they would respect me and give me my space.

However, being in camp the last few days was sure uplifting to say the least. I allowed myself to be the butt of some of jokes, i allowed my peers to tease me, all in the name of fun, well, at least i showed that i wanted to have fun. Hence, the subconscious barrier is broken down and my peers find it easier for them to 'befriend' me again. I truly enjoyed this type of bonding, something that i have been missing out for the last half a year or so. In the last three days, i got plenty of opportunity to catch up on lost time with some of my peers and of course crack some jokes every now and then, and also be the butt of jokes at times.

I would still want some time to myself, afterall, too much of something is not good, still moderation or little doses of something good is the way to go. But, its my last days in camp, really, i would not get such an opportunity to be wrestled with, to enjoy male bondings and stuff (to such a great degree), not outside at least. Maybe, its better to have fun and not think so much, afterall, in a matter of months, i would not be seeing my peers ever so often. This is because, many of us would have finished serving our dear motherland. ORD Loh!

All in the name of fun, joy and laughter...cheers!